Discerning God's will for me has always been the hardest thing to do when it does not involve other people (because then the choice is to love with what maximum capacity I can).
So what am I talking about? It's going back to this whole choosing thing. If God didn't give us freedom of choice, then I wouldn't be having this problem. But then I would also not know love, so I guess I'm stuck with making decisions.
Today at work, my boss randomly said to me, "You're not going back to school next term. We are keeping you here and you will do another coop with us." - To which I awkwardly replied, "um...." and then stared blankly at him. Then after a few moments of not knowing whether or not I should tell him that I can't just do that, he said, said "Just say thank you!". I proceeded to ask him about work. He laughed at how I didn't address his joke, and then answered my question. I was going to say something about how I would fail school and that would not be the greatest thing. And then I realized that my boss probably thinks I don't know how to joke. =( In hindsight, I should've probably responded with, "Well then, you'd better be giving me a raise!!"
Anyways, I found out later that he said that because they weren't able to find a co-op student next term. But I think that was a compliment. I love working for my boss and he treats me well.
This conversation got me thinking; what if at the end of my term, my boss wants me to come back for my next co-op? What about exchange? What if I pass my exam and get accepted into the exchange? What then? I will have to make a choice between two good things. Working here would help me to learn more about the technical aspects of what I want to do in the future, and I would be able to develop valuable relationships and networks. But going on exchange will also open my mind to the world and give me the business and social aspect that will also impact my future.
In situations like these, I usually just hope that only one thing ends up working out, so that I won't have to make such a difficult decision - there would only be one option. But the more that time passes, I am starting to feel like both doors are going to be open. I have no idea what will happen in the future. I can only do my best in all I do, and if the time comes - make a decision.
Here, a beautifully written proverb for me to ponder:
"My son, if you receive my words
and treasure up my commandments with you,
2 making your ear attentive to wisdom
and inclining your heart to understanding;
3 yes, if you call out for insight
and raise your voice for understanding,
4 if you seek it like silver
and search for it as for hidden treasures,
5 then you will understand the fear of the Lord
and find the knowledge of God."
(Proverbs 2:1-5, ESV)
Oh How I Need You - All Sons and Daughters
So what am I talking about? It's going back to this whole choosing thing. If God didn't give us freedom of choice, then I wouldn't be having this problem. But then I would also not know love, so I guess I'm stuck with making decisions.
Today at work, my boss randomly said to me, "You're not going back to school next term. We are keeping you here and you will do another coop with us." - To which I awkwardly replied, "um...." and then stared blankly at him. Then after a few moments of not knowing whether or not I should tell him that I can't just do that, he said, said "Just say thank you!". I proceeded to ask him about work. He laughed at how I didn't address his joke, and then answered my question. I was going to say something about how I would fail school and that would not be the greatest thing. And then I realized that my boss probably thinks I don't know how to joke. =( In hindsight, I should've probably responded with, "Well then, you'd better be giving me a raise!!"
Anyways, I found out later that he said that because they weren't able to find a co-op student next term. But I think that was a compliment. I love working for my boss and he treats me well.
This conversation got me thinking; what if at the end of my term, my boss wants me to come back for my next co-op? What about exchange? What if I pass my exam and get accepted into the exchange? What then? I will have to make a choice between two good things. Working here would help me to learn more about the technical aspects of what I want to do in the future, and I would be able to develop valuable relationships and networks. But going on exchange will also open my mind to the world and give me the business and social aspect that will also impact my future.
In situations like these, I usually just hope that only one thing ends up working out, so that I won't have to make such a difficult decision - there would only be one option. But the more that time passes, I am starting to feel like both doors are going to be open. I have no idea what will happen in the future. I can only do my best in all I do, and if the time comes - make a decision.
Here, a beautifully written proverb for me to ponder:
"My son, if you receive my words
and treasure up my commandments with you,
2 making your ear attentive to wisdom
and inclining your heart to understanding;
3 yes, if you call out for insight
and raise your voice for understanding,
4 if you seek it like silver
and search for it as for hidden treasures,
5 then you will understand the fear of the Lord
and find the knowledge of God."
(Proverbs 2:1-5, ESV)
Oh How I Need You - All Sons and Daughters
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