This morning I woke up thinking that it was the weekend. I lay there in bed, looking up at the ceiling thinking about all the things I was going to do. Then I realized that it was actually Wednesday and that I had less than 10 minutes to get ready for work and get outta my door. It was sad. When I got off the bus, I felt pain in the back of my neck. I don't know why because I sleep in the same position every night - on my back (because I have back pain if I don't), so there couldn't have been any way that I hurt myself during the night.. could there? Anyway, it wore off after I had my breakfast. I feel like these are signs that I'm getting old. But I'm so young, I feel. People keep telling me that they think I'm a lot older. I guess they just don't see my crazy side haha.
Despite the fact that I woke up thinking, and painfully wishing that it was the weekend, I still oddly feel like this week is passing very quickly. It will already be Thursday in less than an hour! I can't wait to go home. I miss my family (and dog)! I need to go home and rest. I will recharge and watch a movie and catch up with my sister. It's funny how much closer I feel like I've become with my family since I left the city.
I never really thought about this much while growing up, but I remember that I watched a video of my friend and my friend's family all having fun together for their grandma's birthday. Everyone in the family; all the children, the adults, and the old people were all dancing and laughing together. I don't really understand why, but watching this video made me tear up and I think it's because I realized that this was something I didn't have - something that I had never got to experience and never will. As all of my grandparents have passed away and I had barely seen them, it didn't seem like I was missing out on much. But as my own parents start to grow older, I am slowly coming to realize that I do not know how to treat them. I don't know what they need or how I should prepare for their aging. Watching that video made me feel so lost as the only family I know are my immediate family and an aunt and uncle - those who moved to Canada. The rest, I know next to nothing about. I had always thought that it was normal. Whenever my friend told me about hanging out with grandparents I just thought of it as something boring, or an extra pair of eyes watching that no one gets into trouble. But as I watched how my friend's family interacted with each other (old people included), I started to get a sense that maybe old people do have a purpose and play an important role in family. Oh well. I guess my kids will know the feeling. That shall be good enough. This is such a new idea to me. That I didn't grow up in a "normal" family. I feel so weird to think like that. But I know that there was a reason for this and that God has yet to show me all He has planned for me. I think this is just one of those things I must work through with Him as I learn to be more mature. I think through this I am learning to love and cherish my family more. Not having grandparents is just a tiny crick that I have to work out of my neck instead of just letting it turn into a dull pain and getting used to it until I feel it no more.
I read Proverbs 6 today. It talks about being careful in promising somebody something that you might not be able to offer. It's the extreme end of generosity. Giving more than you should - when you are accidentally pushed or pressured into giving more than you have to give. The passage warns about "open-ended charity [where] the amount you must give and the timing are determined by circumstances beyond your control". It also makes an analogy to an ant - how it is diligent in storing food for the summer and gathering food at harvest, saying that we need to work and not be lazy in order to stay out of poverty.
Used to Do it Too - Lecrae
Despite the fact that I woke up thinking, and painfully wishing that it was the weekend, I still oddly feel like this week is passing very quickly. It will already be Thursday in less than an hour! I can't wait to go home. I miss my family (and dog)! I need to go home and rest. I will recharge and watch a movie and catch up with my sister. It's funny how much closer I feel like I've become with my family since I left the city.
I never really thought about this much while growing up, but I remember that I watched a video of my friend and my friend's family all having fun together for their grandma's birthday. Everyone in the family; all the children, the adults, and the old people were all dancing and laughing together. I don't really understand why, but watching this video made me tear up and I think it's because I realized that this was something I didn't have - something that I had never got to experience and never will. As all of my grandparents have passed away and I had barely seen them, it didn't seem like I was missing out on much. But as my own parents start to grow older, I am slowly coming to realize that I do not know how to treat them. I don't know what they need or how I should prepare for their aging. Watching that video made me feel so lost as the only family I know are my immediate family and an aunt and uncle - those who moved to Canada. The rest, I know next to nothing about. I had always thought that it was normal. Whenever my friend told me about hanging out with grandparents I just thought of it as something boring, or an extra pair of eyes watching that no one gets into trouble. But as I watched how my friend's family interacted with each other (old people included), I started to get a sense that maybe old people do have a purpose and play an important role in family. Oh well. I guess my kids will know the feeling. That shall be good enough. This is such a new idea to me. That I didn't grow up in a "normal" family. I feel so weird to think like that. But I know that there was a reason for this and that God has yet to show me all He has planned for me. I think this is just one of those things I must work through with Him as I learn to be more mature. I think through this I am learning to love and cherish my family more. Not having grandparents is just a tiny crick that I have to work out of my neck instead of just letting it turn into a dull pain and getting used to it until I feel it no more.
I read Proverbs 6 today. It talks about being careful in promising somebody something that you might not be able to offer. It's the extreme end of generosity. Giving more than you should - when you are accidentally pushed or pressured into giving more than you have to give. The passage warns about "open-ended charity [where] the amount you must give and the timing are determined by circumstances beyond your control". It also makes an analogy to an ant - how it is diligent in storing food for the summer and gathering food at harvest, saying that we need to work and not be lazy in order to stay out of poverty.
Used to Do it Too - Lecrae
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