Wise Words

Proverbs is a place where many wise words are stored, and today I read this passage:

Proverbs 12:15-25 (NIV)   

15 The way of fools seems right to them, 

   but the wise listen to advice.

 16 Fools show their annoyance at once, 

   but the prudent overlook an insult.

 17 An honest witness tells the truth, 

   but a false witness tells lies.

 18 The words of the reckless pierce like swords, 

   but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

 19 Truthful lips endure forever, 

   but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.

 20 Deceit is in the hearts of those who plot evil, 

   but those who promote peace have joy.

 21 No harm overtakes the righteous, 

   but the wicked have their fill of trouble.

 22 The LORD detests lying lips, 

   but he delights in people who are trustworthy.

 23 The prudent keep their knowledge to themselves, 

   but a fool’s heart blurts out folly.

 24 Diligent hands will rule, 

   but laziness ends in forced labor.

 25 Anxiety weighs down the heart, 

   but a kind word cheers it up.

I know that I have been doing my best in learning to always speak the truth to others and in a loving way, but I have also realized that sometimes I can say too much. Although speaking the truth is a good thing, it still hurts to hear it. No matter how loving one can be when speaking the truth, the direct message that the other person is hearing is still the same. Thus, I realized that I need to be more careful about what I say and how I say things when I talk to people. Sometimes I find that I repeat myself, which is something that I don't need to do - especially since the other person has already heard it once, and repetition is just going to make them annoyed. I looked to this passage today to see how I can learn how and when to speak the truth to others. By speaking the truth, I mean telling my friends or people that I communicate with what I feel is right and letting them know if they are wrong or have hurt someone. This is not to say that I go around correcting people, (because I am also someone who makes mistakes) but I mean that when other people talk to me about things or there is a situation - I feel the need to let the person know. I know this probably isn't a good description of what I am trying to say, but I'm not quite sure how to express it in words. In any case, here is what I have learned:

Instead of just letting words run out of my mouth, I will check that

- I have prayed to God for words of wisdom and His guidance

- I am calm and my emotions are separated from what I say

- what I am saying is out of love for that person, not hate, guilt, or to look down on them

- I am not also guilty of the same thing, and if I am, I will admit it

- I choose my words carefully, to ensure that the other person is willing to hear me out instead of get angry

- I do not repeat myself unless asked to

- I let the other person speak first, so that I can hear their thoughts and feelings before I make any assumptions

- everything I say is the full truth 

- I keep everything confidential to those who are not involved