Bitter Buildup

So I've been having something on my heart lately, something small at first, but gradually growing bigger and badder as time went by. I was beginning to judge and make assumptions, and allow negative thoughts about someone else enter my mind and fester. Oh, how dangerous. But I did not have the courage to address the issue. I did not want to cause harm to anyone. I did not want to put myself in a risky situation.

But I came upon this site, and this is what it said,

"It’s evidently a big deal to God how we respond to hard truth. If we are going to become healthy in this area, we need courage and we need humility.

Without courage we will never speak up.
Without humility we will never listen up.

May God grant that the truth spoken in love and received in love might heal our hearts, lead us to repentance, free us from bitterness, and unite the body of Christ."

And this, I pray,

"Lord, make us sensitive to those around us.

That we might see the hurting and be an agent of healing.
That we might see the fallen and lift them.
That we might listen to words of wisdom.
That we might dare to care instead of walking away.
That we might risk misunderstanding to help others.

Grant, O Lord, that our love might be like yours and go right through to the very end.

In the name of Jesus who knows us fully and loves us anyway, Amen."

This sermon was based on 1 Corinthians 7:8-13, which says (NIV),

"8 Even if I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it. Though I did regret it—I see that my letter hurt you, but only for a little while—9 yet now I am happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance. For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed in any way by us. 10 Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. 11 See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done. At every point you have proved yourselves to be innocent in this matter. 12 So even though I wrote to you, it was neither on account of the one who did the wrong nor on account of the injured party, but rather that before God you could see for yourselves how devoted to us you are. 13 By all this we are encouraged.

In addition to our own encouragement, we were especially delighted to see how happy Titus was, because his spirit has been refreshed by all of you."

This verse talks about how Paul was addressing some issues the Corinthian church had, and he admitted that it was hard to tell them the truth - as it would be hard to hear, and hard to say. But he did, and he was glad that he did because it led the people to realize their wrongs and repent. Although I know that I, myself, am not a perfect person, and I have doubts about being "allowed" to tell someone that they are wrong, or what's on my mind, I feel that harboring negative thoughts towards them because I am avoiding the issue is worse. If anything, I should bring the issue up and talk it through, perhaps there is more to what I perceive, or perhaps it is something the other person really needs to hear.

Father, please help me to listen with open hearts. Please let me be gentle, and non-judging. Please be with me and guide me with the right words to say, and give me the patience to listen without interrupting. God, I know that I am not perfect, and I know that I have been wrong in letting negative thoughts build up inside me. Please forgive me for not loving, and not having the courage to speak up sooner. Thank you for giving me a chance to become clean, and for helping me realize what I must do. In Christ's name, Amen.